my First blog

today's horoscope from Yahoo! More than anything else, you need to connect with people who make you happy today.

as in, kahit from sugar high lang, happy na ako. just to get out of this funk i'm in. -==- i feel like i can breathe now, now that the shoot is over. it's been a good day. i'm happy with work that's been done well, so much so that not even a diva coming up to question an action that's been agreed by the rest of the group can bring me down. it's not like there's much of a choice anyway. so there. blleeeehhh :p -==- i wonder how sayang is doing... -==- thursday na bukas. thank God. the week finally feels like it's moving. have you noticed that's been pretty slow? despite the fast pace of each day, it's still slow. hamster-on-wheels. :p -==- as i told Julette in reply to a comment below: i know deep in my heart that there's an alcoholic drink out there with my name on it. i'm going to find it. :p i've been thirsting for alcohol since yesterday. i almost got it, but after being the one to invite people, i cancelled it myself. really was n...

FUCKING hell. i don't need the damn hassle a fucking talent is giving me the night before our goddamn shoot. i don't. watch me blacklist your ass, bitch!! aaaarrrrgggghhhh! add to that my damn radio whose speakers aren't working that great for some unknown reason. pretty fucking inconvenient time to do it too, all i need is noise to fill this damn room so i can drown out the pounding in my head. i hate the fucking week, i hate the last fucking week either. i don't know what the fuck is wrong, i don't think there's anything different with work but i am just so fucking tired. nothing is amusing. things better go well from here on out. i do not want to be mad all the fucking time. and while we're speaking about the other things i'm angry about, let's add the damn dsl connection that's still fucking up until now. or is it just the websites? but right now, i don't need that shit. i don't need to be waiting again just so i can write a useless p...

1. Taga-sunod ka sa utos. Taga-gawa ng halos lahat. At! Waitress ka pa, taga-order ng pagkain. Minsan, driver. Or at least, they use your driver. If not, you pay for the cab. What a paradox - you're sort of a maid, but you're rich enough to pay for shit. whatever. 2. You can die on the job. No, i'm not kidding. Last night, we were at the third "final" viewing of our AVP. We were eating food. I got World Topps. Salpicao daw. cut like beef steak. i dunno what happened, but i was just peacefully eating, trying to cut the meat in smaller pieces when i suddenly swallowed it whole. For the first time in my entire life, i choked. and i don't mean the kind where you cough and things clear. i mean, full-on choke, panic, CANNOT BREATHE AT ALL. and the ones i turned to for help, hit me hard on the back, when they were supposed to push up my stomach. i knew what to do, but i couldn't tell them. I've never been more scared in my life. And then finally, after ...

the past week i've been feeling out-of-sorts. citibank-like, actually. i feel like hurling each time i see the office. it doesn't help that i think the support group is useless. :p they tell me things at the last minute. damn them all. :p -==- i don't feel quite particularly chirpy at the moment. my cheerfulness comes in spurts. sayang is lucky to be around when they happen. he's also unlucky enough to be around when sumpong strikes. i'm not happy with what i'm doing. then again, i'm never happy when things don't go my way. in this job, that happens often. :p -==- the weather outside matches my mood exactly. sort of cloudy, but with a little bit of light. even if i'm sinusumpong, i can't be completely moody. that's tiring. and boring. besides, there's always something to be happy about. like having time to blog nonsense. -==- the weekend was quiet. quieter than most. a little too quiet in fact. :p don't get me wrong, i do like han...

i have a damn 5pm avp viewing later. i hope it ends early. at the moment, i am using sayang's laptop in his office because they're here doing work too. i'd rather be outside doing something else. anyway, i am here because i completely forgot to charge my office line and will no longer last throughout the day. haha, i love being here, it's a little sort of like home. :) but it's still an office, i'd really rather not be here on a weekend. however, we did start this day pretty nicely - had lunch at the weekend market with paolo, arnie, waya and jojo! it's funny how work on weekends and OT on weekends are the only times we manage to get to the weekend market early enough to catch it open. i love it! and yet again, we fell victim to our weird habit of not asking prices (seems to happen in weekend market lang naman) and managed to pick what could be the most expensive meal in the whole damn place. but it's ok, i was satisfied. hehe. i also had dirty ice cream...

hehe. i had so much fun yesterday. i know i sort of drifted off towards the end of the night - all that food made me sleepy and made me realise how tired i was. yesterday was such a weird-assed day for me. i felt like the whole day was one big coordination nightmare. total hell. i was drained by the end of the day. today, i can't be assed to do anything. i may pay for my laziness today, but i sure hope not. :) anyway, last night was funny. all that picture-taking had me thinking about my interest in photography, of how i've been thinking (well, off and on anyway) of studing photography, or at least do more of it. i was looking at waya's dSLR with envy. sigh. i love pictures. i love cameras. i do wish to learn more about it. wish ko na lang that i find a place that conducts classes that fits my schedule. this, along with a refresher course in french so that the five years of french don't go to waste (i hope the office plans about french lessons pushes through). gawd, so ...

i quietly turned 25 today. :) it was definitely one of my more quieter birthdays, but i feel like i've had the most perfect day. thanks to everyone that remembered - who, throughout the day, texted and called - especially to my family, who woke me up with funny greetings. i guess you can sum them up in two - making fun of how "old" i am (my little sisters) and getting senti over how "old" i'm getting (my parents - as my dad said, "malaki ka na!" ahahha). i thought that turning 25 wouldn't be so significant, but it apparently is, the way everyone kept adding it in their texts - mostly to tease me. hehe. now that i'm at home and alone, i figure, it is significant. especially since a lot of my friends and family see this age as the age where i start a new chapter of my life. i guess because this year will lead to next year. and they're right. i am starting a new chapter of my life, and i get to do it with the best asawa one could hope for...

MY GOD. There must be someplace else one can go besides the malls of Manila. There must be someplace else that's easy to go to and don't require much planning, money nor effort. There must be someplace else... kahit one day lang, just out of here. please... :p

Mindless Surveys picked up from Glads and Julette. I'm screwed, my mind has officially turned off and it's only 4pm :p FIRSTS 1st time you tried smoking: 8th grade, megha’s birthday party, malboro menthols pa! haha 1st alcoholic drink you had: Beer 1st time you entered a bar: if it wasn’t 9th grade, it was 10th grade. 1st award you received: something in kindergarten, I can’t really remember. Must be one of those behaviour award thingies 1st hero: hmm… teenage mutant ninja turtles? And the X-men. hehe 1st time you were sent to the principal: NEVER! Haha! 1st college entrance exam you took: do the SATs for Ateneo count? If not, UA&P. 1st teacher in college: oh geez, I can’t remember. Fr. Estrada? 1st job: Account Manager 1st goal you achieved: Getting into 5th year 1st crush: ahaha, some guy back in grade school – I don’t even remember his name anymore. 1st person na binigyan mo ng flowers? Malamang si Mommy – picked from all over the place ☺ 1st date: sa mall? I don’t remem...

right now, i am pissed off. i don't want to be doing this shit anymore. -==- last night, i was looking for a magazine i knew i had in my room, when i threw open this cabinet door to check. my eyes spotted a box in one corner and for a moment, i didn't know what it was. until i realized what it held. old boxed memories i hardly remember. must remember to get rid of soon. it no longer has to be kept. i need that space it is occupying now. -==- looking through that Maldives resort site makes me want to go to the beach so badly. i want to get out of here so badly. when is the next holiday? beach beach beach goddammit! -==- so it gonna be like this? waiting waiting waiting. i'm waiting for a month next year. it hasn't even happened this year yet. so sue me, i'm excited. :) we're meeting our wedding planner today! wala lang. :p i just like how that sounds. -==- it only just hit me yesterday, but it's my birthday next week. and as usual, i don't know what to do...

sometimes i come across pieces of writing that i like. i recently found one, so now i'm posting it on my blog. i gotta admit that when i read this, i missed writing. i seem to write about nothing in particular most of the time. i guess it's because, there's really nothing in particular to say most of the time. maybe, i shouldn't have stopped writing so long ago. ah well, too late. i'll have to be content with writing nothing in particular. :) sad to say, even i can't give this particular author something good to write about. :p We Have No Soul A fundamental rule of writing states that redundancy is a no-no. But I can’t help but say it again. We have no soul. My generation has no soul. This generation doesn’t have a soul. The 70s and 80s were filled with anti-dictatorship sentiments and endless cries for freedom. Now, there is no unifying thought, no revolutionary idea, nothing that moves people to act. There is nothing worth believing in. There is nothing to...

really. aside from watching Eragon, there wasn't much that happened this weekend. it was all food, tv, couches, bed - basically lazed around. well, spending time with the family also since they were set to leave sunday. yes, all is quiet again in our household. i still cried like a baby yesterday when they left. you'd think i'd be used to it already. my goodness. so anyway, i miss going out. i haven't gone out in AGES. :p haay

as we were channel-surfing earlier, we both stopped to check out a Sun Cruises ad. while we're not so sure about cruises, it made me think about how much i wanted to travel. there are so many places one can go, so many people one can see. even in this country, there is still so much of this country i've yet to see. it doesn't help that there are so many budget airlines now, that i get email alerts from cebu pacific telling me that they've lowered their rates yet again. i wish it were easy to just up and leave... but no, there's work. and there's always the issue of money. while i know money this year is mostly going to be kept for next year, i still have that urge to plan trips to wherever. ah well, we'll see... maybe dad will push through with that big cross-country road trip he's planning in the summer. maybe we'll get super good rates in the summer for boracay. maybe sometime this year, we'll be able to just up and go. to somewhere. :) man, wh...

He's a Maltese. 2 months old. and was christened Frostie by my family. ahaha :D i wanted to call him Furball but i got vetoed. When he was playing around the house last night, he looked like a wind-up stuffed dog. soo adorable. in love. :D Frostie hanging out on mom's lap :)

you're all going to have to forgive me, but wedding thoughts are bound to come up often this year. and most likely sometime during the next as well. i wouldn't worry though, it's only been two weeks into the new year, i'm sure some other things will come up that i'll blog about. but even then, the wedding-related thoughts will still abound this is pathetically embarrassing, but i'm proud to say that i no longer have to feel guilty or feel like i'm too much of a dreamer or feel like i'm indulging in too much wishful thinking when i doodle variations of the following in my notebook: ahaha... and i don't have to scribble over them too, out of guilt. pathetic. :D but indulge me, please. :D

i was telling rap the other day, that sometimes i get this feeling that while i'm in my "place", i also feel like i don't quite fit in it like i used to. sort of like a square peg trying to fit into a round hole, except, i used to be a round peg. i'm sure that sounds vague, but that's exactly how it is. it's probably a function of not being present as often as i'd like to be nor being involved as i should be. or a function of having other things on my mind. but whatever it is, i feel sad. i'm sure it will pass. probably one of those things that come with it being a new year and all. ah fuck. doesn't matter.

this is late - as i initially did this last dec.20. :) i'm finally finding time to post it, but i'm revising some parts a bit, may mga humabol eh! haha! :) What did you do in 2006 that you'd never done before? Bought BIG stuff and then recalled it (haha, don't ask). AND WE GOT ENGAGED! WOHOO!!! hehe :) Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don't remember if i actually did... and i think i will make resolutions for next year, i just don't know what exactly yet. :) Did anyone close to you give birth? Nope, no one close to me gave birth in 2006.. but in a totally unrelated note, my super cute inaanak bea turned one tho! hehe :) edit: Julette was right! CIA did give birth last year! goes to show how much of a blur 2006 was, feeling ko it was ages already since she gave birth to Kirby, and yet, he's only about to turn one! :p Did anyone close to you die? No, thank goodness. :) What countries did you visit? Thailand...

am still at home. am still sick. and yet, i'm working! :p and buti na lang that i am, because i was right. my bilins really weren't being done because they're too busy doing something else. :p haaaay.... i wish another opportunity would drop into my lap again...

posted in multiply - 8 Jan am i the only one having problems logging onto blogger? :p so i'm posting here instead, hoping that the cross-post will work. :p my blog's been quiet and it's not as if i have nothing to say - it's just i can't log on! :p anyway, i'm at home.. sick.. for the first time in the longest time. i woke up today with a bad sore throat and hardly no voice. now that it's mid-afternoon though, i'm feeling a lot better. and am actually able to talk. the past weekend was a blast.. but it was pretty much a family weekend. saturday was reserved for my mom's family - the massive villarin clan - for that annual get-together at our house. this usually happens before christmas, but due to unavoidable circumstances (ie. holidays started late so family arrived late), we had it last weekend instead. My mom already reserved Rap and I for this weekend so he was here as well, to experience first-hand how crazy these things get. Case in point, they...

i am currently functioning at work with only half a brain. ok, make that a quarter of a brain. :D the rest is currently floating on a cloud, in a constant brainstorm and daydream with itself. it's a struggle this, to find a mind that consistently sort-of rejects work thoughts and prefers to wander off instead. floating on a cloud with a foot on the ground. and yet, i love where i am. -==- yesterday, guia pointed out how different my life is now from this time last year. as always, i am thankful. -==- i usually have some new year's post... this year, i dunno what to say. except, that i am thankful. honored. excited. psyched. if-you-find-a-word-greater-than-happy-then-that's-it happy. -==- by the way, we reserved the church na. if it was real before, it's more real now! we walked out of santuario's office yesterday giggling. haha. :) -==- I AM SO LOVING ALL OF THIS.