my First blog

I've been waiting for the end of the week since Monday started, and I turned on my computer and found a hated email of a work schedule for saturday (yes, tomorrow). Call me a brat, but I value my weekends, especially when all I do is look forward to them because it means being free - from waiting, from OT, from clients. This saturday though, I get to spend 9-5 with some of them. The consolation is, at least it's only from 9 to 5. fuck me, pa rin. sigh. I admit, I did not start this week out right. I was mad for the better part of monday, out of it on tuesday and for the rest of the week i've felt like i've just been going through the motions of work. I don't know how I can say this but I am fucking tired of the shit called work. It must be that time of the year - it is almost october. I'm always thirsting for a change of scene, even for a few days, come october. i've never really figured out why that is so. My mind is going on strike, even stubbornly refus...

I sometimes have moments where I feel like so many things are happening. I don't know if this is a function of my multitasking self (it must be), but man, sometimes things just keep happening. Other times, I have this feeling that the world just keeps going while i'm stuck in one place. The beat just keeps going. Of course, the world keeps turning. Anyway, it makes me all nostalgic because time just keeps zooming by. How are you supposed to stop and smell the roses and appreciate moments when moments are gone in a blink of an eye? Maybe the trick is to breathe deeply. haha -==- I have momentarily forgotten and now remembered that there's a new book waiting for me at home. It's been waiting for me since Saturday. Yes, Saturday! :p It's a book called Twilight by Stephanie Meyer (part one of a trilogy) and I picked it up because it's supposedly about a vampire and love and loving a vampire. I've always been fascinated by vampires, but I've never read Dracul...

right now, i hate the word busy. and i hate feeling like a child. oh well.

I feel this small

Industry parties are almost always fun, and Provill's victory party last night is no exception. True open bar, great music - this is why you're production house of the year! yeah! haha (no connection at all, i know). Had loads of fun. If my feet hadn't given up on me, I would've kept on dancing. Hmm.. that makes it three times within the week that i've been able to dance. The Lord is good. hehehe :) At least I can forget about moodswings, thoughts and being sad in the middle of the dancefloor. Welcome break. :) Now I have a heavy head. Maybe I should've skipped work today. Seems like a lot of people have. Or just massively late. haha! -==- I've decided that in light of the coming big changes in my life and the preparations for it, I shouldn't shake my comfort zone too much just yet. That being said, I'm not resiging. I almost did. :) -==- Weekend na. Fall out Boy later. Too bad he has a shoot tomorrow, it would've been a perfect weekend. :p

Gotta start weighing things now :) Thank you Lord, for answered requests. :)

If you find me sweating on a dancefloor more than I usually do at the gym, it means i've found my own little version of heaven here on earth. That being said, Warehouse 135's Remembering Planet Mars event last Saturday with Elmer Dado kicked major ass. For a girl who missed out on the heydays of Mars (first, too young. second, was not even living in this country at all), I relished in being able to dance to music I've heard and has had me wiggling in my seat. haha :) Plus the fact that Elmer Dado played a lot of classics! Super super saya! Also had fun dancing with my asawa (yes! he danced with me! wohoo), who was probably reliving memories of his Mars days. hahahaha :) Thanks to Julette for making us reserve the date and making sure we'll be there. After the longest time, I found myself dressed up on a Saturday night and out at a club. It's been ages. And i'm glad that the one time we did go, it wasn't the stand-around-holding-a-drink kind of thing. It was ...

1. I am surrounded by clichés come to life. in fact, I may even be one. 2. I have come a very long way. 3. My anger sometimes scares me. 4. Seems like most of our life is spent waiting. Like what i'm doing now. Just plain waiting. 5. I desperately want my weekend to please start.

I am a chatter. I'm on YM. but I hardly ever use anything else on it. Especially my webcam. I just can't be bothered. But today I caught one my best friends online (whom I saw again for the first time after 5-6 years last year in Canada where he now lives) and we both turned on our cams. Haha! I forget how funny webcam is. I even got to show him my ring. I don't know when I'll be back in Canada nor when he'll be back here so YM and webcams are the next best thing. Thank God Ian's finally back online! haha! Let's see na lang how often we can catch each other. okay, the blurry picture on the left is our pathetic attempt to camwhore. haha

I admit. I'm a watch freak. Right now, this lovely Philip Stein has had my heart in its grasp. I don't have a white watch (excuse, excuse!) and even before I found out that white watches are "of the moment", i have already fallen in love with white, large watches. Oh how I want this. It's gorgeous. It'll look great on my wrist, I'm very sure. haha. But oh well. How fucking expensive. :p

Yesterday, as we were trying to narrow down target markets for research, everyone got into the discussion of moving lifestages and how a 28yo first-time mom probably has the same mindset as that of a 38yo first-time mom. How these would have moved from the "single" state of mind to one where there is no more or minimal selfishness and where life is seen differently because of different/added priorities. In the course of listening, I realised. I realised I only have 10 months left to be truly selfish. Initially, I expected to be a little sad at the thought. But I'm surprisingly not. I'm actually excited. I'm looking forward to it. Tama na siguro muna ang selfishness. I think I milked that for all its worth the past 25 years. :D Of course, on the days I feel like being selfish (I am only human, after all), I should remember to look back at this. :D

A few minutes after the post below was posted and after a few ym exchanges with Gladys, my phone did one better than texting. It rang. hmm. Maybe i should write things more often. :)

let my phone ring. If not a call, then let a text message go through. :p

because of a series of events, i hd about four hours sleep each night this whole week. thus, it has made me very tired and caused me to miss: 1. Another one of Crizel's gigs in Chef and Brewers. With the barkada there, including Kris and Joe. Rap was OT, and by the time he ended, i was ready to crash. :p 2. A nice lineup of gigs at Saguijo that included Sinosikat (who i've been wanting to catch for the longest time). Due to the lack of sleep, i ended with a headache and slept most of the night. See, the thing about being so tired during the week is that you can't milk your weekends for all they're worth. Yes, i realise that you're meant to rest during the weekend but you're also meant to make the most out of it too. I hope this week is better, because there's a nice lineup of gimiks for the end of the week. I look forward to it. I have no plans of ditching friends again. I hate it. :p -==- I'm also quite emotionally tired. This week, i've swung from ...

it's damn hard to work for someone you don't respect nor trust. no, don't read into that wrong. it's NO ONE from my agency. and that is all that i will say about it. -==- being given another road to take is very interesting. i look forward to walking a bit more and seeing a bit of what's out there. i hope it doesn't disappoint. :)