Current State of Mind
I can't quite figure out my current state of mind. I feel like I'm suspended somewhere. Like, my life only moves once I am out of the office but while I'm here it seems to stop. Then all I look forward to is 630pm - official log out time.
I wonder what happened. I remember being okay exactly where I am at work in recent memory. I think I mentioned to Reg that it must have had something to do with being psyched to leave and then changing my mind. So now i'm readjusting. Slowly fitting myself back into the peg that was made for me, after having tried to rise out of it.
Like all things that change, it passes. This i know for a fact. Just that with the last holiday and the upcoming long one, it's making the adjustment a little harder.
-==-
I'm hoping to go home this long holiday. I'm currently mentally kicking myself for forgetting about the holiday and not thinking of travelling sooner. Now i've been beaten when it comes to leaves and my going home now precariously depends on my ever-changing schedule at work.
That has never happened to me and it's making me cranky. Makes me hate work even more. Sigh.
Why does this whole "i hate work" thing still come in cycles? Shouldn't I just be looking at this as a matter-of-fact by now?
:p
-==-
I hate being caught unaware, especially when I know that fixing things will equal to a lot of hard work. Especially when I could've had a lot more time to fix things. Now I just can't be fucked. I can't. But I have too :p
Sigh. But I guess it couldn't have been helped. He was (is) too busy after all.
-==-
I am ashamed to admit, but sometimes I get sad, or maybe even envious, whenever I hear of couples who announce their wedding plans after us but have their weddings BEFORE us. Some strange emotion I can't quite name has me thinking that I should go first because I announced first. Haha! It’s illogical and irrational I know. :) But it doesn’t last. I just remind myself of the reasons why we picked the date we picked and I'm ok.
Nine months. If akin to pregnancy, we give birth to a new life in 9 months. Our new life corny as that may sound.
-==-
Speaking of weddings, my good friend Vicky will be getting married exactly a week before I will. haha :) So I've been reading her blog and now we've started emailing back and forth talking about gowns (she's having a hard time figuring out what she wants), about dates, about numbers of tables and general excitement.
It's very funny and slightly weird. We used to just talk about her weird fascination for contact sports (Vicky is TINY) and catching up and asking where we'll catch each other. Now we're talking about weddings.
We're getting old. hahaha :)
-==-
Speaking of getting old, I have a newfound fascination for some magazines in our subscription pool (for competitives) that I NEVER used to pay attention to. Not even the covers.
You may be wondering what titles?
Again I'm ashamed to admit but they are: Smart Parenting, Metro WorkingMom and Yummy.
Good Lord.
-==-
Yesterday, we had this short conversation about how everyone seems to want to go back to school for something or other. Have I mentioned that the thought of MBA has crossed my mind? After considering the options and timing, I decided to forego it. I don't think I can handle classes and big adjustments all at the same time just yet. Plus the fact that classes are from 6-9pm everyday. What happens to me if i have to shoot? OT? sigh.
So no. I'm not too sad about it though. haha. While thinking about it, I still couldn't imagine myself being back at school. So maybe it's better that I decided not to.
-==-
Lord, please let us go home in two weeks.... :p
I wonder what happened. I remember being okay exactly where I am at work in recent memory. I think I mentioned to Reg that it must have had something to do with being psyched to leave and then changing my mind. So now i'm readjusting. Slowly fitting myself back into the peg that was made for me, after having tried to rise out of it.
Like all things that change, it passes. This i know for a fact. Just that with the last holiday and the upcoming long one, it's making the adjustment a little harder.
-==-
I'm hoping to go home this long holiday. I'm currently mentally kicking myself for forgetting about the holiday and not thinking of travelling sooner. Now i've been beaten when it comes to leaves and my going home now precariously depends on my ever-changing schedule at work.
That has never happened to me and it's making me cranky. Makes me hate work even more. Sigh.
Why does this whole "i hate work" thing still come in cycles? Shouldn't I just be looking at this as a matter-of-fact by now?
:p
-==-
I hate being caught unaware, especially when I know that fixing things will equal to a lot of hard work. Especially when I could've had a lot more time to fix things. Now I just can't be fucked. I can't. But I have too :p
Sigh. But I guess it couldn't have been helped. He was (is) too busy after all.
-==-
I am ashamed to admit, but sometimes I get sad, or maybe even envious, whenever I hear of couples who announce their wedding plans after us but have their weddings BEFORE us. Some strange emotion I can't quite name has me thinking that I should go first because I announced first. Haha! It’s illogical and irrational I know. :) But it doesn’t last. I just remind myself of the reasons why we picked the date we picked and I'm ok.
Nine months. If akin to pregnancy, we give birth to a new life in 9 months. Our new life corny as that may sound.
-==-
Speaking of weddings, my good friend Vicky will be getting married exactly a week before I will. haha :) So I've been reading her blog and now we've started emailing back and forth talking about gowns (she's having a hard time figuring out what she wants), about dates, about numbers of tables and general excitement.
It's very funny and slightly weird. We used to just talk about her weird fascination for contact sports (Vicky is TINY) and catching up and asking where we'll catch each other. Now we're talking about weddings.
We're getting old. hahaha :)
-==-
Speaking of getting old, I have a newfound fascination for some magazines in our subscription pool (for competitives) that I NEVER used to pay attention to. Not even the covers.
You may be wondering what titles?
Again I'm ashamed to admit but they are: Smart Parenting, Metro WorkingMom and Yummy.
Good Lord.
-==-
Yesterday, we had this short conversation about how everyone seems to want to go back to school for something or other. Have I mentioned that the thought of MBA has crossed my mind? After considering the options and timing, I decided to forego it. I don't think I can handle classes and big adjustments all at the same time just yet. Plus the fact that classes are from 6-9pm everyday. What happens to me if i have to shoot? OT? sigh.
So no. I'm not too sad about it though. haha. While thinking about it, I still couldn't imagine myself being back at school. So maybe it's better that I decided not to.
-==-
Lord, please let us go home in two weeks.... :p
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