the restlessness is back
gawd, is this some sort of yearly thing? it's almost a tradition - whenever it hits at this particular time of the year, i get restless.
and that just goes on until the actual end of the year.
and it's not as if i'm not busy with work or whatever. i've been actually using my brain lately - after it being on hiatus for a month or so. :p
but i. am. still. restless.
i wonder what i'm looking for now??
-==-
the kick-ass thing about this month tho, is the upcoming beach trip at the end of the month with my girls.
this was a goal - now it's practically fulfilled. i've got our tickets, our accommodations are set. all that's left now are 20 days till we go. knowing how time has this ability to just zoom past, i'm sure those 20 days will be gone in no time.
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speaking of time zooming past, i wish it'd slow down somehow. this year just flew on by, i don't think i've had enough time to really digest everything that has happened. i don't even remember some of them. :p i also find that i sometimes mix the events from 2004 with the ones that happened in 2005.
i guess, what i'm trying to say is that time is running too quickly for my taste - only because it catches me unprepared. you have plans and everything, and the next thing you know the opportunity has passed and you've missed it. or that the thing you meant to do is suddenly upon you without you realizing it.
if this means that i'm scared that i won't be able to do some things because time is running by me, then yeah, i guess so. :p
so are we slaves to time? of course we are... just.. slow down a bit somehow so we can actually relish you, you know? :p
-==-
living away from home has made me miss some things. i was looking through pictures earlier with my mom and i've missed out on a lot of stuff.
particularly, i'm missing out on my sisters' transitions from one age to another. i left home in 99, when inna was only 4. i'd only see her about a maximum of 4 times a year and she's bigger each time. i hardly ever see the in between. it's the same with aneka. when i left, she was only about to turn 9. she'll be 15 in a week. i never got to see the in between either. when they get here, they're always older, taller, and something's always different.
i look at the pictures and see how much they've grown and i realize that i remember them like this, how they're captured in pictures - certain moments in time. never in between.
oh well, that's what i get for being the eldest and for the big age gap. :p
-==-
i think i'm a little homesick. i used to go home at this time of the year too, but i'm not going to this year. it's a little weird. mom is here now, but she's leaving on saturday. bet you anything, i'm gonna wish that she can take me back with her, even just for a bit.
-==-
i think i should go and sleep now before i start wallowing... gotta keep my head up this week, i need my brain. :p
and that just goes on until the actual end of the year.
and it's not as if i'm not busy with work or whatever. i've been actually using my brain lately - after it being on hiatus for a month or so. :p
but i. am. still. restless.
i wonder what i'm looking for now??
-==-
the kick-ass thing about this month tho, is the upcoming beach trip at the end of the month with my girls.
this was a goal - now it's practically fulfilled. i've got our tickets, our accommodations are set. all that's left now are 20 days till we go. knowing how time has this ability to just zoom past, i'm sure those 20 days will be gone in no time.
-==-
speaking of time zooming past, i wish it'd slow down somehow. this year just flew on by, i don't think i've had enough time to really digest everything that has happened. i don't even remember some of them. :p i also find that i sometimes mix the events from 2004 with the ones that happened in 2005.
i guess, what i'm trying to say is that time is running too quickly for my taste - only because it catches me unprepared. you have plans and everything, and the next thing you know the opportunity has passed and you've missed it. or that the thing you meant to do is suddenly upon you without you realizing it.
if this means that i'm scared that i won't be able to do some things because time is running by me, then yeah, i guess so. :p
so are we slaves to time? of course we are... just.. slow down a bit somehow so we can actually relish you, you know? :p
-==-
living away from home has made me miss some things. i was looking through pictures earlier with my mom and i've missed out on a lot of stuff.
particularly, i'm missing out on my sisters' transitions from one age to another. i left home in 99, when inna was only 4. i'd only see her about a maximum of 4 times a year and she's bigger each time. i hardly ever see the in between. it's the same with aneka. when i left, she was only about to turn 9. she'll be 15 in a week. i never got to see the in between either. when they get here, they're always older, taller, and something's always different.
i look at the pictures and see how much they've grown and i realize that i remember them like this, how they're captured in pictures - certain moments in time. never in between.
oh well, that's what i get for being the eldest and for the big age gap. :p
-==-
i think i'm a little homesick. i used to go home at this time of the year too, but i'm not going to this year. it's a little weird. mom is here now, but she's leaving on saturday. bet you anything, i'm gonna wish that she can take me back with her, even just for a bit.
-==-
i think i should go and sleep now before i start wallowing... gotta keep my head up this week, i need my brain. :p
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